Smoke ’em if ya got ’em

We here at Idol Chatter have always been a little partial to that holiday of the gods, aka 420. As you’ll remember from season’s past, that Farmacist, Dr P Haze, has been known to provide herbal remedies to help cope with some of the less than stellar performances we’ve been subjected to over the seasons. So, in honor of this holiday, we raise our piece and pray to the gods that boutylicious songstress, that fabulous Miss Alicia Keys slips some elixer to these frauds begging for our votes. And we all pray that Ryan (“cocaine’s a helluva drug”) can medicate enough to make it through the entire show without the hysteronics that he pulled out his ass last week. Now let’s boldly toke together and [again] thank the gods for sending that goddess of sultry.

Casey
Don’t stop thinking about tomorrow
Same old. Same old. Blah. Seriously y’all, if you liked his performance two weeks ago, you liked it tonight. Why? Because they were the same. One-note wonderific!

Lee
The Boxer
This rendition of Simon & Garfunkle’s number was done up and did over to fit the modern day and boy howdy, did Lee deliver. We are not too medicated to recognize a masterful (for these frauds) performance when we hear one. This child apparently recognizes who his competition is and is doing his dangdest to throw some spike strips to slow her train.

Tim
Better days
There was nothing that indicated a better day was ahead EXCEPT…for the final note at which point we all breathed a huge sigh of relief that it was over and Tim was going home.

Aaron
I believe I can fly
Hope y’all are drinking seriously hard on this one with all that inappropriate arm waving going on. Jeezis. I sometimes believe I can cook but you won’t see me on Top Chef.

Siobhan
When you believe
I believe and have now acheived the miracle of projectile vomiting.

Big Mike
Hero
Can we watch him put on his fairy wings and fly away? Huh? Please? And can we also acknowlege that black does not slim everyone…especially when you’re poured into them.

Momma Sox
People get ready
I’m ready to crown mamma sox the winner. Stunning. No other words are necessary. Yep, “just thank the lord!” BTW…some people might say the mic stand from home looked an aweful lot like a hooka. Just sayin.

Tomorrow night we’ll have to listen to Ryan beg for our money so we can “give back.” It always makes me wonder why he can’t just give some of his own personal fortune he gets from Idol and then shut the hell up (again…”cocaine’s a helluva drug”). But as we all know, that would be asking too much. Don’t forget to add time to your DVR! Night y’all!

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One Response to Smoke ’em if ya got ’em

  1. Robb says:

    “Ngi Ne Themba” for Siobahn no matter what you say. (She has that tattoo, means I have hope.)

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